Mary’s Visit

I subscribe to a website that scours state park’s reservations listings and sends me notices about ones I’m interested in. February 1st, I got a notice of a cabin open Presidents’ Day weekend at Blue Spring when Mary would be visiting with her children. I jumped on. Time to show Bella and Remi what manatees look like.

They would visit Ryan’s dad and sister in Fort Myers while we birded in Belize. Then they would come to Orlando, Ryan would return to California and work, Mary et al would visit us for 10 days. Perfect. This has been a hard-fought decision with Mary anxious about traveling with children, especially the return by herself. We’d agreed on the basic dates before I’d made a commitment and put down our deposit for Belize. They couldn’t come until Ryan had taken an important test at the beginning of February, then he would have time for leave. All good until mid-January when she suggested she come before Ryan rather than stay after. I was already booked with events I couldn’t change. Plus I was annoyed she hadn’t called. I told her January was not good, come in February as we agreed. Relations were chilly. Communication rare.

The pandemic has taken a terrible toll with its isolation, both for Mary and the kids. Social butterfly Bella had gotten used to interacting lots of people in Okinawa on and off base, talking to everyone she met. Then they moved to California, and immediately she was cut off from any human contact other than her mom, dad, and infant brother. Remi, on the other hand, missed all the normal socializing that toddlers usually receive. No library, no playground, no seeing people around the neighborhood. This has eased in the last year, because Remi has a speech therapist come to the house weekly. However, I think it will take a long time for this generation of children to recover. They are part of an unintended experiment, as are the adults. For Mary, cut off from girlfriends and family, it has been very hard. I didn’t realize how hard. She has really struggled. She thought I didn’t want to be with her children (she claimed I was the only grandmother who didn’t dote); she didn’t understand the reality is I couldn’t, and still can’t, take care of them on my own because my shoulders and hamstrings were/are too sore to let me lift them. No, I didn’t jump at the chance to babysit so Ryan and she could have a date night. I was too uncomfortable with that responsibility. But, had I known she was so distressed, I’d have come immediately and stayed as long as she needed me. After we’d put the car seats in my truck, which Mary swore was impossible, and the yelling quieted down, we’ve kissed and made up. 

And we’ve headed to Blue Spring State Park. We’d already picnicked at Wekiva Springs State Park, but now we had 3 days and 2 nights to explore a park. Our first time down to the boardwalk and spring area yielded no manatees, but it was lovely just to be able to enjoy being out. 

We saw fish in the springs, squirrels running along the railings, and an armadillo shuffling along besides the boardwalk. It seems everyone travels with dogs, so Bella and Remi had lots to consider petting. They aren’t quite sure they want to, but are so interested. Mary has done an excellent job of teaching them to ask the owner if they can. Unfortunately, often the owner doesn’t hear their question, so we had to remain vigilant. It’s all I can do not bitch continually about incompetent dog owners. Is “pull” the only command they teach now days? Grrrr.

We made s’mores at our campfire that evening.

Our friends Paula and Dave live in Deland, so we arranged a visit. I try this every time we come to Blue Spring but they are usually at their house in DC near their daughter. Finally, connection. Paula mentioned the doggie Mardi Gras parade in Deland Saturday morning, so we thought that would be a cute event. Thank goodness I looked up the website. This is a big production that 40,000 people attend. Organizer, the Krewe de Alamee, has raised over $600,000 for local charities. Hmm, perhaps we should have a plan. Paula said park at the library, I said we’re leaving the cabin at 9:00 to get in place for the 11:00 parade. We left by 9:15, not bad for this traveling amoeba. And a good thing we went so early: almost all of the library’s parking lot has been torn up for new construction. We grabbed one of the few remaining spots and carried our chairs over to a front row spot in the last block of the parade route. Perfect. One adult stayed with the chairs and the others explored the festival. Grant found a Cuban coffee, I found the Chess Park bathrooms. Then the parade. Dogs, beads, more dogs, more beads. Dogs in costumes, owners in costumes. The local high school’s Marching Bulldog band. Search and rescue dogs and their handlers, all in uniforms (vests for the dogs). Dachshunds on a float because their legs are too short to walk the whole way. Great fun. Mary’s friend Sondra joined us for lunch, then spent the night at the cabin. It was wonderful to hear those two giggle and laugh for hours.

The next morning, Grant and I got up early to check for manatees. They were all nestled at the edge of the springs next to the river, including 4 of the 12 rehabilitated ones who’d been released Monday. Those all have floats attached with breakaway ropes tied around their tails. We roused the group, except Sandra who was able to sleep through our coming and going, amazingly. Back to the boardwalk in time to see the ranger put her canoe in the water for the daily manatee count. Surely. 20+.

Monday, we drove the Lake Apopka Wildlife Drive. I’d brought my scope so we could look at birds, especially the ducks, but the alligators were all over the road. Our enthusiasm for getting out disappeared. We were content to just look out the windows.

The next day, a visit to Aunt Peg’s, where Bella cut sunflowers to bring home. Peg cuts flowers every morning and puts them in the refrigerated trailer Robert bought to store them until he takes them to market. She also starts the seeds, I think having a set to plant every 2 weeks. A good mom.

Our last day was packing. The airport was a trial. Mary had to return her rental car (note to self and her: next time a van. The truck was too crowded with those huge car seats.) We had the kids and the luggage. Offloading Remi into the stroller with a minimum of crying. Parking Bella next to him, her glued to her “show phone”. Then extracting the car seats, which have a back tie down clipped to an anchor behind the seat back that has to be folded down to get to in addition to the seatbelt that goes through a slot reachable if you know how to and are able to pop up the car seat’s padding. Good grief. But we did it and had arranged for a porter to load up all the luggage and the 2 car seats in their protective covers on her carriage by the time Mary met us. I had made her an appointment with TSA, so once she finally had her bags checked, we walked over to security, hugged goodbye, and they were gone. I only teared up a little as I walked back to Grant waiting at curbside with the truck. 

I’ve already bought tickets to visit in April, and we’re talking about a summer visit with perhaps Bella staying after, then my bringing her home. TBD.